Amazing Final Fantasy Race
Rejected Audition Tapes

Cid and Shera are in their kitchen, while a hidden camera captures them discussing the prospect of entering The Amazing Final Fantasy Race.

SHERA: Good morning, Cid.

CID: Mornin'.

SHERA: Tea?

CID: Of course! When have I not had tea in the morning!?

SHERA: Of course. I just want to make sure you're in a good mood.

CID: Why? You wanna buy some more useless #^$@?

SHERA: Oh no, I just want you happy.

CID: Yeaaah, I've heard that before.

SHERA: I was just curious. You know that show we were watching last night? The one Barret was on briefly? And Tifa before that? The Amazing Final Fantasy Race?

CID: I remember. Looked %$@^&%# easy!

SHERA: Yeah, you say that every time it's on. So I was thinking. Would we make a good team? What if we applied?

CID: You 'n me? %#@% no! I'd go with somebody that could win with me! Someone like Cloud! Or Vincent! Or...hell, even Palmer! Sorry, Shera. You just ain't got the strength or stamina.

SHERA: I understand. But you aren't great at those, either.

CID: You wanting to fight!?

SHERA: Of course not! But with all the smoking. . . .

CID: It's lung training! If they can tolerate years of chain smoking, they'll be good enough for that dumb race!

SHERA: Of course. And it also builds muscle...right?

CID: #$%^ no! Are you taking your stupid pills again!? I thought you were a scientist! Now you're proving you couldn't even be the brains if we were on that show! Smoking doesn't improve muscles!

SHERA: Of course not. So I would be the strong one?

CID: Wh..WH..What the #$%^ are you talking about? I'm the strong one! Duh, Shera!

SHERA: Don't you remember that time on the rocket when that huge hunk of metal nearly crushed you?

CID: You had a better position!

SHERA: And you, Cloud, and that other friend of yours combined couldn't lift it off of you?

CID: We'd have gotten it!

SHERA: And when I came in, suddenly we were able to lift it and save you?

CID: We loosened it!

SHERA: It wasn't a jar of pickles!

CID: ...We'd never make it on that $@#%^$@ show. You complain too much.

SHERA: Fine. #$^@ you, Cid.