Episode 9: Part 1

<Announcer Gippal>
     Gippal walked around a small island in the middle of a pond. He passed by a large green frog with a beard as tossed a handful of fish food into the pond. Several large, black tadpoles quickly rose up and swarmed on the food, then upon noticing it was only fish food, they scattered and submerged. Gippal shrugged and faced the camera. "I'm standing at Tadpole Pond in the beautiful, though very weird, Mushroom Kingdom. This Pond is the home to frogs all across this land, but more importantly-" the tadpoles rose again and started making a loud clatter, forcing Gippal to speak louder, "-BUT MORE IMPORTANTLY IT'S THE EIGHTH PITSTOP IN A RACE ACROSS WORLDS. Teams raced from between several worlds in the Kingdom Hearts galaxy, where the Shinras accidentally incurred a large penalty. They struggled as they and the other teams battled their way through the Mushroom Kingdom to the pitstop at Tadpole Pond, but in the end, Auron and Jecht were just barely behind the Shinras' penalty period and were eliminated. Can the Shinras catch up to the pack after falling behind from the penalty? Will Yuna and Rikku maintain their one minute lead? Yuna and Rikku, who were first to arrive at 3:02 pm, will depart at 3:02 am."

<Rikku & Yuna: Cousins, 1st to depart: 3:02 am>
     Yuna held up the clue to rip it, then dropped her arms to waist level and looked at Rikku. "Do we wait for Rufus and his father?"
     "They're really far behind," Rikku said. "And this is closing in on the finale! Screw Rufus!"
     "But I can't do that unless we wait!" Yuna replied quickly. She paused for a few moments to think. "Oh, that type of- Yeah, okay." She quickly ripped open the clue and read it. "Find Toadofsky and compose a melody."

<Announcer Gippal>
     "For this task, which is not a detour, nor a roadblock, teams must locate the famous composer known as Toadofsky. Then, using his musical tadpoles, they must arrange a song worthy of Toadofsky's approval. Once approved, he will provide teams with their next clue."

<Rikku & Yuna: Currently in 1st>
     "Let's hurry," Yuna said as Rikku sprinted ahead. "But wait for me!"
     Rikku started to leave Tadpole Pond when suddenly she stopped and cupped her ear. "I hear music this way!" She ran to the left as Yuna tagged along as they entered a new section of the pond where a long rectangular strip of water was marked by thin white lines laying just above the water level. The area was well secluded and considering only tall, leafy bushes blocked them off, the water and small area around it projected the sound very well. They looked ahead as a mushroom headed person with long golden locks of hair stood with a baton attempting to command several tadpoles that made different sounds as they were at different bars of the magical water scale before them.
     "Can you compose, Yunie?" Rikku asked.
     "I was a pop singer," Yuna said matter-of-factly. "But then again, I mostly just used La. Fa, Do, and Re mean nothing to me."
     "Ready to compose?" Toadofsky asked Yuna and Rikku.
     "Sure!" Rikku said, grabbing the baton. "You on the end! You're Fa! And you on the other end! You're ALSO Fa!"

<Steiner & Beatrix: Dating, 2nd to depart: 3:03 am>
     "Beatrix-dear?" Steiner said before Beatrix could open the clue. "I apologize for my foolish behavior on the previous expedition."
     "It's okay," Beatrix said. "Now let's hurry to keep our lead. We must go-" she ripped open the clue and read it silently to herself. "We must go compose a melody."
     "Perfect!" Steiner screamed, flailing his arms in the air. "I have seen many plays in my lifetime while aiding Queen Brahne!"
     "Yes, I know. I was there as well."
     Steiner nodded. "Indeed you were! We shall dominate!"
     "If this Toadofsky is up at 3 am," Beatrix said, trailing off.
     They ran together and hopped along the path of tadpole heads until they reached Toadofsky's pond, where Steiner immediately covered his ears at the disturbing chain noises coming from the tadpoles.
     "Dreadful!" Steiner said aloud.
     "No no no, YOU are Fa, and YOU are Do!" Rikku yelled at the tadpoles, pointing her baton angrily. "It goes "La La La La La Fa Do So! Not La La La La La Do Fa So!"
     The tadpoles shrugged their nonexistent shoulders.
     "It's not quite right," Toadofsky said as the tadpoles played their tune. "Rethink your arrangement. These new people get a turn now."
     Steiner ran to take the baton, but Beatrix grabbed it before he could.
     "I've seen your leadership skills and I've heard you singing in the bath house," Beatrix told Steiner. "This is a woman's job."
     She held up the baton as if she had done this for years and informed the tadpoles of their notes. She pointed to them one by one and simply told them their notes. "Fa." "Re." "So." "So."
     As Beatrix told the tadpoles their notes, Steiner scooted close to the seventh tadpole and whispered to him. "Don't be a So. Be a Mi. Trust me."
     The tadpole nodded, despite not having a neck.
     The tadpoles performed their melody as instructed by Beatrix and Steiner.
     "That didn't sound like a So-" Beatrix started until Toadofsky's screaming interrupted her.
     "-So performance!" Toadofsky finished her sentence. "That was brilliant! It was so powerful at the end! Here is your clue!"
     Toadofsky handed Beatrix a clue, which she reluctantly took. She looked at Steiner. "You made him a Mi, did you not?"
     "I did indeed," Steiner said.
     "A genius decision!" Toadofsky said, putting a hand on Steiner's shoulder. "Genius!"
     "Yeah yeah, but I wrote the other seven. You just wrote one note!"
     "Genius!" Toadofsky sang and took the baton from Beatrix and handed it to Rikku.
     "I loved your seven," Steiner said as he kissed Beatrix on the cheek.
     "Thank you, Adelbert," Beatrix said as she ripped open the clue. "Make your way to the town of Marrymore."

<Announcer Gippal>
     "Teams must now travel to the town of Marrymore beyond Booster Hill. Due to past encounters with the owner of the Booster area, also known as Booster, teams will be given two dinosaur creatures to ride. These long-tongued, smooth-skinned, shoe-wearing, saddle-having dinosaurs are very friendly and are very easy to command, though they do not understand our language. Except for one, but no teams will gain control of Yoshi. It would be an unfair advantage."

<Steiner & Beatrix: Dating, Currently in 1st>
     "Interesting creatures," Steiner said as he mounted a yellow yoshi. "Like Chocobos, but not as tall, nor fast, not feathery, and they're fairly slimy."
     "We shall manage," Beatrix said as she mounted the matching yellow yoshi. The two rode off in what they remembered to be the direction of Marrymore.

<Amarant & Lani: Coworkers, 3rd to depart: 3:17 am>
     "I like our team," Lani said.
     "What team?" Amarant asked.
     "It's my team, and that's the best part about it. You have no say in anything. It's pure love. I love myself."
     "A little too often," Amarant added before opening the clue and handing it to Lani.
     "Thank you," she said. "Heh, look at me. Being all polite to a giant chicken. I'm so perfect. Now come. We have to perform a song."
     The pair ran off the small island and headed to Toadofsky's pond, where Toadofsky was raving wildly.
     "Brilliant!" Toadofsky sang. "Brilliaaaaaaaant!"
     Rikku held up her arms victoriously and welcomed Toadofsky's praise before taking the clue and reading through it. "To the yoshis!" she finally announced to Yuna.
     Yuna and Rikku both hopped on the green yoshis and headed west.
     "I hope it's this way," Yuna said. "I don't think it's the Midas thingy direction. It's probably where we were supposed to go, had we not used a cloud taxi."
     "If you say so," Rikku said.
     "You think I'm wrong? Should we wait for Rufus?" Yuna asked.
     "He wouldn't know either," Rikku said. "Just pick a direction and we'll go that way."
     "Then east maybe?" Yuna asked. "I'm not very sure. It might be the river way."
     "That's not picking, Yunie."
     "East. We'll go east."
     Yuna and Rikku stopped their yoshis and had them turn around and walk in the other direction, now heading east by northeast.

     "How did you some up with something so spectacular!?" Toadofsky raved to Lani.
     "Oh, it was nothing," Lani said. "I'm just perfect in every way."
     "You didn't even write it," Amarant said. "You just wanted the baton really badly and I wouldn't give it up so you acted like a four-year old. Like always."
     "Hey! Mi Mi Mi Mi Mi Mi Mi Mi is a rockin' composition. I'm spectacular, and I have the clue. And I am going to-" she ripped open the clue, "Marrymore using one of those dino-things. The red one because it matches my hair. And your umm, comb. That's what chickens have, right?"
     Amarant mounted the second red yoshi and headed west toward Marrymore.

<Shinra & Rufus: Father/Son, Last to depart: 3:32 am>
     "They didn't wait," Rufus said.
     "You expected them to?" Shinra said. "Rabbibunny, what did I teach you?"
     "Nothing. Not even my name."
     "Besides all that."
     Rufus looked blankly at his father, then shook his head and ripped open the clue. "I don't get you. Let's go compose a melody."
     "All that practice at the Honey Bee- err, Singing Land, is going to pay off!" Shinra said.
     "Maybe it's for the best you tell me nothing."
     Rufus ran ahead and reached Toadofsky's pond and looked around in disappointment. "No other teams," he sighed as he took Toadofsky's baton and began composing.
     "Mi So Fa Ti Mi So Fa Ti," Rufus said to the tadpoles. They arranged themselves and played it.
     Toadofsky slid to Rufus and began bowing to him. "That was amazing. AMAZING! What is it called!?"
     "Me So Fatty," Rufus responded. "It's a song about my father."
     "It's magical. Inspired. Amazing!" Toadofsky sang and handed Rufus the clue.
     Rufus read the clue aloud, then he and Shinra trotted to the remaining blue yoshis and hopped on their backs. Shinra's bucked a bit at first, but soon cooperated and the Shinras were left looking in several directions.
     "Which way?" Rufus asked.
     "That way," Shinra said, pointing west. "We skipped a large portion of towns that direction, while the river course to the east was free of towns. It must be west."
     Rufus shrugged and agreed and the Shinras headed west.

     "What do you suppose Marrymore is like?" Yuna asked Rikku as their yoshis slowly galloped east.
     "I'm not sure, but wouldn't it be dreamy if it was a town of marriage with cute little mushroom guys getting married in a cute mushroom church?" Rikku responded.
     "Like that church we flew over in the cloud! It was so cute. It wasn't a mushroom shaped church, but it was so pretty! And there were so many cute little mushroom headed guys outside and-" Yuna and Rikku both halted their yoshis instantly and stared at each other for exactly four seconds before yanking the yoshis' reins and pointing them toward the west.
     "We've got to get the hang of this one day," Rikku said.
     "Yeah..." 

     Lani sat wide-eyed on her yoshi as she stared blankly in front of her. Amarant looked over and, after hesitation, finally spoke.
     "What's with the staring?" Amarant asked.
     "My yoshi thing just ate one of those shy masky guys," Lani responded. "I totally want one of these dinos now. I would feed all my enemies to it!"
     "Sounds like you have smart investments planned for your half of the million gil," Amarant said, just as his own yoshi shot its tongue out and snagged a rather large gecko creature, then sucked it into it's mouth and swallowed. "Okay, I kind of want one too."
     "See!? They're pimped out!"

     Steiner and Beatrix reached Marrymore and found the clue box just outside of the inn. They looked around at the scenery of the town as they walked to the box. It was a fairly remote and quiet town that seemed to have one central theme: marriage. Several mushroom headed people lined up for a picture while a line formed outside the town's church of mushroom people waiting to get married. The church dwarfed the rest of the town with its sophisticated design and location at the top of the town on the top of the tallest hill.
     Beatrix reached into the box for her clue and quickly ripped it open and read it aloud. "Roadblock: Who wants to get married?"
     Steiner gulped loudly and the armor coating his legs began to clatter together.
     "It's not a serious question," Beatrix informed Steiner. "You're so cute, Adelbert. Why don't you give this one a try?"
     "I- I-" Steiner shook out his arms and composed himself. He saluted Beatrix. "I shall do it! What must I do?"

<Announcer Gippal>
     "A roadblock is a task that only one team member may perform. In this roadblock, that team member must enter the church and locate three pieces of a bride's wedding gear: shoes, a ring, and a brooch. The catch to this detour is that teams must be quiet while finding the gear because a wedding is always in progress, and if they interrupt it they will be kicked out and must start again. They must give these three items to a man in a black suit in the back of the church, who will give them their next clue."

     "You sure you're up to it, Rusty?" Beatrix teased.
     "Adelbert Steiner: Captain of the Knights of Pluto does not fail!" Steiner raced into the church and began his search. There were several pews, each with a candelabrum at the end. In the front of the room were two mushroom headed people standing side by side in front of a podium where a minister stood. To his right was an organ, complete with an organist.
     Steiner immediately spotted the reflective light shooting from the ring beneath the back pew and he rushed in to grab it, but was met with several "SHH!"s as a mushroom headed man in a black suit approached him and pointed to the door. Steiner jumped angrily and his armor again rattled noisily, but after noticing his flaw, he exited calmly and waited outside where a small, one-minute hourglass awaited him. He flipped it and began removing portions of his armor.
     Once the time had expired, Steiner finished removing his bulky chestplate, revealing a smaller chainmail shirt beneath it and reentered the church. He walked slowly to the ring he had spotted early and picked it up, then began looking around further. He made a motion to move to the pew across from him, but a small mushroom headed girl with the ring began walking down the middle of the church and Steiner quickly sat down and watched to avoid causing trouble.

<Amarant & Lani: Coworkers, Currently in 2nd>
     Amarant and Lani rode into town and found the clue box, which was blocked by a small mushroom headed boy. Amarant dismounted his yoshi, but Lani stayed on hers.
     "Okay, Skoshi," Lani said to her yoshi. "A little to the left, aaaaand- eat him!" She poked her yoshi on the head, but he did nothing. She patted its head. "We'll work on it."
     Amarant shoved past the kid and grabbed the clue from the box. The mushroom headed boy saw Amarant, who towered over the boy, and ran home. "Who wants to get married?" Amarant read.
     "Ha ha ha ha ha! It's sooooooo your turn!" Lani teased. "Now some guy is gonna make you his bitch!"
     Amarant read through the criteria and turned to the church. He walked as slowly as always as he took what seemed like an eternity to enter the church. He immediately noticed Steiner, who was crawling around like an idiot looking for the garments. Amarant moved behind the pew in the last row and looked around carefully.
     After watching Steiner triumphantly find the brooch, Amarant made his move quickly. He reached into the pew directly in front of him and grabbed a ring sitting on the seat, then walked down the left side aisle and pulled a pair of shoes out from underneath the organist.
     Steiner shook his fist angrily at Amarant, but quickly resumed his hunt for his own pair of shoes.
     Amarant on the other hand, had already spotted a brooch hanging from an unlit candle in the third row. He walked casually to the candle and quickly grabbed it, then walked down the far right aisle to the man in black. He examined the items and handed Amarant his clue.
     Amarant walked outside only a few minutes after arriving and threw the clue at Lani.
     "Sometimes I could just hump your leg," Lani said.
     "I don't want things to come down to amputation, now read it and let's go," Amarant replied.
     Lani opened the clue. "Make your way to Land's End."

<Announcer Gippal>
     "Teams must now travel to Land's End. After scaling a series of ladders supplied by our staff and traveling through other oddities of the area, teams will find the next clue."

<Amarant & Lani: Coworkers, Currently in 1st>
     "Mount your Kooshi," Lani ordered Amarant. "I named him for you since I know you won't. Just because you did well on that roadblock I've opted to not naming him something horribly dirty."
     "Thanks," Amarant said. "Can we win money instead of naming our creatures though?"
     "You're such a pain," Lani said. "Let's go. It's this way. That kid you scared gave me a map of the area."
     "Then turn the map right-side-up and let's go the correct way," Amarant said as he grabbed Lani's reins and pulled her yoshi in the opposite direction. The two rode off to the east.

<Shinra & Rufus: Father/Son, Currently in 3rd>
     Rufus leapt off his yoshi and grabbed the clue out of the box. "Roadblock. It's mine whatever it is."
     "All yours," Shinra said, opening a small bag of peanuts.
     "I really don't know where you find those things," Rufus said. He shook it off and ran to the church and slowly entered the door. In the corner of the room, Steiner shook his fist at nothing in particular as he searched for the shoes. Rufus immediately began crawling and quickly remembered why he should never crawl as his knee pinned his jacket to the ground and he fell chin first into the floor. He tried his best not to make noise, but there was still an instinctual yelp of pain.
     The man in black approached him and kneeled down to him, but instead of asking him to leave, he instead asked "Are you okay?"
     Rufus opened his mouth to respond, but stopped and with a big grin shook a finger at the man. Instead of speaking, he just gave a thumbs up and mouthed: Fine, thanks.
     Rufus began crawling again, this time with his jacket properly draped over his back. He immediately found a ring hiding on a religious book and tossed it into his pocket. He ducked down and began crawling under the pews and nearly crawled directly into a pair of shoes sitting in front of him, which he quickly pocketed. Then, without even moving, he noticed another pair of shoes directly in front of the first pair. He slid down to check Steiner's location, then pushed the shoes into a corner, almost under the base of a nearby candelabrum. He then resumed the hunt for the brooch.
     Steiner finally copied Rufus and dropped onto his chest. As he did so, a pair of heels pressed into his right cheek, leaving a red indent. He smiled victoriously as he grabbed the shoes and snuck out of the church, stepping in high tip-toes with arms in front of him. He finally (and entirely non-conspicuously) gave the items to the man in black and received his clue.
     He ran outside and handed the clue to Beatrix, who ripped it open and read it. "Okay, good job, Adelbert-honey," Beatrix said with a quick kiss on his cheek. They hopped on their yoshis and rode off to the east just as Rikku and Yuna rode up.

<Rikku & Yuna: Last to Roadblock>
     "Hurry," Rikku yelled as she hopped off her yoshi and grabbed the clue. "Roadblock. It's yours."
     "Rufus has been in there a few minutes," Shinra said to her as he rose off the ground he was sitting on. "Think we're the bottom two so far. Think you can beat Rufus?"
     Yuna read the clue and tucked it into her clevage, which considering the large size of clues, looked very awkward. "Of course I can," Yuna said with a nod. "It's accessories searching, and I'm a girl. I can spot them from miles away!"
     "It's true, you know," Rikku said. She looked at Yuna and finally shoved her toward the church. "Get going, girl!"
     Shinra watched as Yuna ran inside the church, then finally turned to Rikku. "What do you think will happen in there? We're battling for last place."
     "Yeah, we need navigating skills," Rikku said. "I don't know that they won't help each other."
     "We're done," Shinra said, extending his hand to Rikku. "Us. Our team and yours."
     Rikku looked at him strangely, then looked out in the way Steiner and Beatrix had ridden, only to find them completely out of eyesight. "Fighting for the final position."
     "I hope we both catch up and pass one of those teams. It's been fun playing with you girls, even at my age where I can't keep up, and I hope it's either non-elimination or Lani breaks her collarbone, but we can't count on those, so let's be adults and not deceive each other."
     "I thought you were like, the king of deception though. Business man like yourself."
     "Rufus wouldn't like me playing this way against you two," Shinra said. "I say this to you for him. But if you tell him I said this-" he pointed at the camera, "or if you air this-" he returned his focus to Rikku, "I'll deny it to my fullest abilities."
     "Roger that," Rikku said.
     "Roger, have I used that yet?" Shinra pondered to himself.