Episode 11: Part 3

     "It is time," the monk told Rufus. "You may enter."
     "Finally," Rufus said. He stood from the temple steps where he, Shinra, and Edgar sat. Shinra and Edgar hesitated while standing up, until the white orb they had teleported in by glowed bright and caught their eyes. They watched out of curiosity, then saw Yuna, Rikku, and Paine materialize before them, lying on the ground a bit dazed and confused.
     "Hurry!" Edgar shouted as he turned and ran inside the temple. Rufus tugged on Shinra's jacket collar and the two darted in after him.

     Yuna took the clue that O'aka had handed her, but before even reading it, Rikku tugged her along. Yuna tore at the clue while Rikku led her inside.
     "We have to complete the Cloister of Trials to obtain our clue," Yuna explained, having ripped the clue from its envelope and skimmed through it. "I never was very good at those. Lulu had to help me with even the Besaid one."
     "Don't worry, we'll think of something!" Rikku said.

     Rufus did not even stop to admire the sites around him. The only thing he noticed was a strange band played in the middle of the circular room, which he was forced to run around. There were two large statues on either side of a tall staircase with a single door at the top. Rufus completely ignored the doors to the left and right of the stairs because he was too focused on the red and yellow flag hanging at the top of the stairs.
     Rufus ran up the stairs and was joined by Edgar and Shinra. A monk handed them a key with a "1" printed on the small red and yellow tag.
     "There are three cloisters set up for mutual puzzle solving," the monk said. "Use door number 1 for your puzzle."
     "Are they all the same?" Shinra asked. "We want the easiest puzzle."
     "All are the exact same," the monk said. "Although room 1 is the nicest because it is the actual cloister, while the others are replicas. But they're very good replicas made by the Al Bhed."
     "Whatever, let's go," Rufus said. The trio of boys ran in the door and were faced with three options: door one directly ahead, two on the left, and three on the right. They quickly opened door one and ran inside, where they were met with an ice room with three giant pillars. There was a path up to the tops of the giant pillars, but it ended abruptly. There were glowing orbs emitting from small recesses in the walls.
     "Okay, we need to find a destruction sphere and put it in the somewhere and get our clue. Let's just start searching," Edgar said. Rufus and Shinra nodded in agreement and ran to the spheres in the walls.
     "This it?" Shinra said, pulling a white orb from a recess in the far wall. He looked at it for a minute, then dropped it on the ground. It shattered on the ground and exploded in a white puff.
     "Don't do that anymore," Rufus said, holding his own white orb.
     "How else do we know if it's a destruction sphere though?" Shinra asked.
     "I don't know!" Rufus yelled. "But there's no way that that's it!"
     Shinra found a green orb and dropped it on the ground. It shattered and leaked a green goo on the ground.
     "Stop it!" Rufus yelled. "Stop breaking everything! Remember how we're in the non-replica room? I think you're making their Jesus cry."
     "Maybe it's buried," Edgar said. "There's lots of snow in here. Maybe dig through some of it?"
     "You can do that," Rufus said. "Just don't break everything like that fat sack of crap is doing."

     "Room two," Rikku said, pointing at the door with a large two on it.
     Yuna put the key with the '2' keychain on it into the keyhole and turned it. The door swung open and the three girls entered.
     "Weird," Paine said, looking around at the room of snow and ice.
     "It's too bad we aren't in the Bevelle temple," Rikku said. "I'm good with machina.
     "We can do this!" Yuna said. "Everybody, we're looking for the purple sphere. Find it quickly!"
     "That one?" Paine said, pointing to a purple orb in a tall spire of ice.
     "Good eye, Paine!" Yuna said happily.
     "Since when is eye pain good?" Rikku asked. Rikku pondered to herself for a couple seconds. "Ohh, Paine. right. Never mind. I was thinking of something else."
     "How do we get it?" Paine asked. "I've never been in one of these."
     "I always had people do them for me," Yuna said. "Maybe if we just reach for it?"
     "Cheerleader style!" Rikku shouted. "Come on, Paine!"
     "Fine," Paine responded. She and Rikku walked next to the tall spire of ice with the sphere. Both bent down and laced their hands together close to the ground, then looked up at Yuna.
     "Ready, Yunie?" Rikku asked.
     "Ready!" Yuna said. She ran to the girls and stuck one foot in their hand net and balanced herself by putting her hands on either girls' shoulders.
     "1, 2, 3!" The girls counted off. On three, Paine and Rikku thrust their hands into the air and sent Yuna flying. She twisted in the air and finally reached out and grabbed the purple sphere before gravity jerked her back down to the ground. Rikku and Paine tried to catch her, but because of the icy ground, Rikku slipped and fell, her feet sliding into Paine's shins. Paine caught Yuna poorly, then dropped Yuna on Rikku before falling on top of the fallen Yuna.
     "Y..... R..... P....." Rikku muttered from the bottom of the pile.
     "Hooray..." Yuna said, holding onto the purple destruction sphere.
     "I'm so cold," Rikku said. She shivered from her exposed back and legs being pressed against the ice.

<Amarant & Lani: Coworkers, Jecht: Assistant, Currently in Last>
     "You're sure this is it!?" Lani shouted at Amarant over the loud humming of the airship's motor.
     "Yes," Amarant said. "Get ready to jump."
     "You're stupid crazy," Lani said.
     "I've done crazier," Jecht said, stretching out his arms and legs.
     "We're close enough, let's go," Amarant said.
     Amarant and Jecht ran at the ship and jumped up on the ledge of the ship, only ever touching the edge with one foot as they pushed off the ship and flew into the sky, plummeting quickly into the shiny island.
     Lani threw a quick tantrum involving stomping and waving her arms, then ran at the edge of the ship and flipped over the side, never once touching the ledge. "I hate heights!" she shouted as she fell behind the boys.
     Lani fell closer and closer to the island and watched as Amarant and Jecht disappeared from sight, then she shut her eyes and screamed loudly until she felt something poking at her shoulder. She stopped screaming and looked behind her where Jecht was prodding her with two fingers in the shoulder.
     "Get up," Jecht said. "You'll get cold in the snow."
     Lani hopped out of the snow and grabbed the clue she spotted in Amarant's hand. "Gimme that! We need to go in-"
     "The temple," Amarant said. "Yeah, we read it already. You're slowing me down now."
     The trio rushed into the temple and ran to the stairs. They shoved their way through the band in the middle and ran up the stairs. Lani took the key from the monk without even letting him say anything and opened the door with the 3 on it.
     "This.... is not a puzzle," Lani said.
     "That's what I always thought too," Jecht said. "And this temple looks a bit different from how I remembered it, but it shouldn't be too hard."
     "You've done this before?" Lani asked Jecht. "You know where we are?"
     "We're back in Spira," Jecht said. "At Macarena Temple or whatever it's called."
     "So how do we get the prize?"
     "We need a purple sphere. Find that and we'll blow a hole somewhere and find out clue."
     "You heard him!" Lani shouted at Amarant. "Search! Search! It's purple like your favorite color!"

     "I think I"ve got it," Edgar said. "You see that pedestal over there?" Edgar pointed to a blue object about waist high with a sphere shaped recess in the corner. It looked like a strange skinny endtable. "Let's put that on that shiny glyph I made by putting things in the holes.
     "Okay, I'm ready," Rufus said. "Here, fatty! Don't let it go over the cliff again." Rufus shoved the pedestal in Shinra's direction. It slid across the frictionless ice floor and reached Shinra, who grabbed it and redirected it toward Edgar, who was standing at the base of a steep incline. The incline only went up a short distance and leveled off, where a bright green glyph on the ground was glowing. The glyph was circular with strange patterns, the most distinct of which was an arrow pointing to the left.  Edgar caught the pedestal and helped to slide it up the incline. It slid at the incline, but hit the first part of the slope and toppled over.
     "Your plan sucks," Rufus said. He walked to Edgar and kicked at the fallen pedestal. "That pedestal sucks. Your glyph sucks. This whole puzzle sucks." He walked up to the glyph and stomped on it. The glyph glowed and suddenly Rufus disappeared. He shot to the other side of the room in the direction the arrow pointed and reappeared after colliding with a tall ice spire. He slid down the ice in massive amounts of pain.
     "Raggedy Andy?" Shinra said as he approached his fallen son.
     "I'm fine," Rufus said. "I just need to lay here a min-" Rufus stopped talking and patted at his jacket's breast pocket. He reached inside and pulled out a glowing purple sphere. "I think this is the destruction sphere I heard the monk talking about earlier."
     "Cool," Shinra said. He took the sphere and started to walk away from Rufus.
     "Wait!" Rufus yelled after him. "If you break that thing, I'm going to push you off a cliff and make sure no phoenix down ever finds its way down to you."
     "That'd be fine," Shinra said jokingly. "After all, Shinras bounce."
     Rufus rubbed his face with a red, ice-spire-shaped bump. "No. No they don't."

     "I say it's this one," Rikku said, pointing to a recess in a column. The trio of girls stood in a side pit of the temple where there was a column, a wall with a sphere recess, and an incomplete column, missing the bottom but sticking up through the roof and continuing upward.
     "Actually, I think it's this one," Yuna said, sticking it in the wall recess. Suddenly the orb glowed, then a purple line ran from the sphere. It traveled down the wall and across the path the girls stood on, even passing under Rikku's left foot. Suddenly it reached the end and there was a small explosion, revealing a treasure box.
     "Genius!" Rikku shouted. She ran to the box and opened it. Inside was a clue, which she quickly ripped open. "Exit the temple and travel to the Macalania Travel Agency."

<Announcer Gippal>
     "Teams must now exit the main temple and run along the snow covered cliffs until they reach the exit to the temple completely. Upon exiting, they will find snow mobiles provided by the wonderful Al Bhed. Each team will slide onto a snow mobile and travel along the frozen lake until the Travel Agency, where they will find their next clue.

<Rikku & Yuna: Cousins, Paine: Assistant, Currently in 1st>
     "Let's go, girls!" Yuna shouted. "We're on a roll!"
     "Pretty cold roll," Rikku said. "I'm still freezing my buns off. Can we find an oven or something?"
     "I don't get you two," Paine said. "Let's just hurry up and get cookin'."
     "I get it!" Rikku laughed.
     "Get what?" Paine asked.
     The room grew silent and was only unsilenced when Yuna decided to lead the group out of the puzzle room and out of the temple. The three girls ran quickly along the curving cliffs and up a set of stairs at the end. The three ran up quickly and reached the snow mobiles. There were three long snow mobiles, each with a red and yellow flag flying off the back end. The path ahead of them was a moderately narrow canyon, all entirely composed of ice and snow.
     Yuna ran forward and leapt onto the snow mobile yelling "Y!"
     "R!" Rikku shouted as she slid on behind Yuna. She leaned forward and whispered, "and doctor..."
     "I'm not saying it now," Paine said. She walked slowly to the snow mobile and sat down behind Rikku.
     "Aww, never any fun," Rikku said. "Hit it, Yunie!"
     "Right!" Yuna said, slamming her foot on the gas pedal. The snow mobile didn't respond. Yuna glanced down at a key in the ignition. It pointed to "Off". "Ohh, right!" Yuna said. She turned the key and slammed on the gas, this time propelling the snow mobile down the ice.
     The snow mobile continued on its path, sometimes hitting a snag and getting out of control, but never straying far from the actual path. It finally reached the end of the icy canyon and opened onto a large open circle of ice. Behind the ice was a small incline that rounded the perimeter of the ice and led to a building labeled "Lake Macalania Travel Agency." Directly in the middle of the ice was the green-topped clue box.
     Yuna shut the snow mobile off and all three girls hopped off the snow mobile. Yuna, however, forgot that she was riding on ice and let the snow mobile continue to slide across the ice until hitting a snow bank close to the travel agency building.
     "Oops," Yuna said.
     Rikku brushed the accident off like it was nothing and pulled the clue from the box. "Defeat the machina?"

<Announcer Gippal>
     "Teams must now fight off a horde of machina, including twelve small machine machina and one large machina with the power to launch a magic absorbing speck. Once defeating the machina, teams will receive their next clue."

<Rikku & Yuna: Cousins, Paine: Assistant, Currently in 1st>
     "Machina should be no problem," Rikku said. "I can take them apart piece by piece."
     "Or we can just smash them," Paine said.
     "Or that."
     Yuna, Rikku, and Paine got ready for battle as three small machina engaged them. They had two hydraulic legs and a single hydraulic arm with a large forked weapon. They had a single camera atop protruding from their bodies as a type of head.
     "Ready girls?" Yuna asked.
     "Ready!" the two responded.

<Shinra & Rufus: Father/Son, Edgar: Assistant>
     "Here!" Rufus yelled as he stuck the destruction sphere into a recess on the wall. A purple line streamed from the sphere and blew a hole in the ground, revealing a treasure chest. Shinra opened the chest and pulled out the clue.
     "Exit the temple and travel to the Macalania Travel Agency," he read.
     "Let's go," Rufus ordered.
     "You feel all right?" Edgar asked. "It wasn't that long ago that you were thrust into a giant pillar of ice."
     "I'm fine. The ice instantly numbed me anyway."
     "You can put a slab of meat on it after the race," Shinra said.
     "No thanks. I've seen how crazy you get around meat," Rufus said. "You'd eat me for sure."
     The three boys ran out of the temple and headed for the snow mobiles.

<Amarant & Lani: Coworkers, Jecht: Assistant>
     "I always hated these," Jecht said. He took a white Macalania sphere from the wall and placed it in a pillar. A patch of ice grew from the top of the pillar and formed one third of a path above them. "Dangit, I swear I remember doing that back in my day. Then again, I drank a lot back in my day."
     "Wonderful," Lani sighed. She kicked a nearby wall. "I hate puzzles!"
     "Just keep looking," Amarant said. He put a green glyph sphere into a pillar and waiting for a reaction that didn't come. "I've tried just about everything with this green thing. I don't think it goes anywhere."
     "Those never did anything fun," Jecht said. "We're looking for the purple one."
     "There are no purple ones!" Lani shouted.

<Rikku & Yuna: Cousins, Paine: Assistant, Currently in 1st>
     "They ain't got nothin' on me!" Rikku shouted. "Machina shmachina."
     "That should be all the small ones," Yuna said. "Unless I counted wrong... again."
     "You didn't," Paine said. "Here it comes."
     A machina flew in from the sky. It was a type that Rikku, in all her knowledge of machines, had never seen before. It had a large body, all unpainted and gray. The front had a face painted on it with giant teeth, two eyes, and a protruding pig-like nose that was actually a gas cap for the airplane. On either side of the aircraft, both almost on the underside, were two blue missiles, each with one giant eye painted on and a toothless, yet jagged mouth. The ship immediately engaged the girls. 
     The left missile began the battle by opening its seemingly painted mouth and firing a laser at Rikku. She dodged it, but only barely. The laser left a small smooth hole through the ice below.
     "Take out the missiles first," Paine said.
     "Uhh, yeah," Rikku agreed.
     Yuna tried to draw the ship's fire by shooting at the main body. She succeeded in getting the aircraft's attention, but unfortunately it resulted in a large barrage of attacks all directed at herself. The left missile fired another laser while the right opened its mouth and shot out several smaller missiles. Yuna was forced to stop her attack to dance around and defend herself. The right missile opened up to fire another attack, when suddenly Paine jumped up and slashed at the missile with her sword. The missile detached and fell to the ground. The other missile and the main body redirected their attention to Paine.
     "Bring it on, punk," Paine said to the ship.
     It was then that Rikku noticed the driver of the airship in a small cockpit toward the back of the aircraft. He wore a strange gasmask and had a shaved blonde head.
     "He's Al Bhed," Rikku said to herself. She watched the machine take aim at Paine, then yelled at the ship. "Ujan rana!"
     The ship redirected at Rikku and lost sight of Paine, which caused the aircraft to again lose a missile to Paine.
     "Ha ha!" Rikku said to the ship. "Dyga dryd, cemmo vyla! Hajan dinh ouin pylg uh Paine! Pid ed'c ugyo. E ghuf oui fana zicd tecdnyldat po so caqo puto."

     "Wonderful," Rufus said as he drove the snow mobile to the center of the ice, where the girls were currently in battle with a flying ship. "Rikku speaks some strange language. This doesn't look good."
     "You talk to things you fight?" Edgar asked Rufus.
     "Well no, but still, there may be locals around to help her. We can't let them have any advantages over us."
     "They already have one, Ricky-Bobby," Shinra said. "They're further than us."
     "We can pass them," Rufus said. "Look. That thing flies. I use a gun, as do you."
     "Don't forget me," Edgar said. He pulled a giant mechanical crossbow out of his back and leaned it on his right shoulder. "My auto crossbow should help us a lot."
     "Excellent," Rufus said. He grabbed their clue and read through it. "Can it help against those guys?" Rufus pointed to three approaching small machina. 
     The one armed bandits moved in for an attack when suddenly Edgar unloaded his auto crossbow at them. It fired bolts at each machina, hitting each one three times. All three machina fell and three more began moving in to engage them.
     "I'd say so," Edgar said.
     "Remember you two, you're not competing against each other," Shinra said.
     "Of course not," Rufus said. He fired his shotgun at a nearby machina without even looking at his target. The machina exploded into several parts. "No competition what-so-ever."

     "This guy sure can take a lot," Yuna said over her own loud barrage of gunfire.
     "No kidding," Paine said. She and Rikku continued to jump and slice at the flying machina. Sometimes successfully, sometimes not. A small object shot out the top of the ship. It was a shiny yellow sphere that simply floated in place and glowed a lot. Yuna quickly shot it out of the air.
     "What is that?" Rikku asked.
     "Not sure," Yuna said. "It sure keeps making it a lot though."
     Suddenly the nose of the ship opened and pointed at Yuna. A large blue mass of energy began gathering for what looked to be a rather powerful charge. It fired off a giant wave cannon at Yuna, but Paine jumped in front and blocked most of the blast, though rather painfully.
     "Paine, are you okay!?" Yuna asked nervously.
     "Just... kill it," Paine said.
     Yuna looked up and saw the nose still wide open. She raised her guns up and fired one bullet from each gun directly down the nose of the ship. There was a small explosion of fire within the front of the ship and the ship quickly crashed to the ice below. Luckily, the ice was thick enough that it barely even cracked.
     The driver emerged from the ship and walked the clue over to Yuna. "Rana'c ouin lmia. Cunno ypuid ouin vneaht. Cra'mm pa veha. Ed zicd cdehkc y ped."
     "Dryhg oui," Rikku said to him.
     "Oh, I umm," Yuna stuttered. "Drug whee." She turned her attention to Paine, who was already on her feet, dusting herself off. "Are-"
     "I'm fine," Paine said. "What's in the clue?"
     Rikku ripped the clue open and read quietly to herself. Finally she looked up. "Another stop sign."
     "That's my cue," Paine said. "Good luck, Yuna. Rikku."
     "Thank you so much for your help," Yuna said. Rikku nodded in agreement.
     Rikku looked back down at the clue. "Make your way to Guadosalam."

<Announcer Gippal>
     "Teams must now travel to the guado city known as Guadosalam. To get there, teams must navigate the mysterious Macalania Woods. From there, teams will run through the land of eternal lightning: the Thunder Plains. There are several lightning towers to collect the lightning, but the bright flashes and loud noises still may startle teams. Beyond the Thunder Plains is Guadosalam, where a clue box by the infamous house of Maester Seymour stands.

<Rikku & Yuna: Cousins, Currently in 1st>
     "Aqlica sa, cen. Ruf tu fa kad du Guadosalam?" Rikku asked the Al Bhed pilot.
     "Drnuikr dra fuutc, drah ylnucc dra bmyehc," he responded.
     "Dryhg oui," Rikku said happily. She grabbed Yuna by the wrist and led her up the spiral incline by the travel agency.
     The exit to the icy lands of Lake Macalania was a strange shift. There was a large forest with blue light reflecting across reflective trees with branches wide enough for two people to walk side by side. Several blue and red butterflies floated around their heads as Yuna and Rikku jogged through the forest. It was only a short distance they had run before Rikku stopped jogging and began walking slowly.
     "What's wrong?" Yuna asked.
     "Thunder Plains," she responded. "I know I stayed a like, week here, but it still scares me a teeny bit."
     "Just remember: it's for a million gil."
     "A fear that can bite my small, round, petite, adorable butt," Rikku said. "Let's go!"
     Yuna and Rikku both broke out into a near sprint as they ran out of the woods and into a barren wasteland. All that was around them were several towers, each which was continually being blasted with bolts of lightning from the eternally dark skies. A heavy fog rose from their feet to their heads, then back down again. The environment continued to pulse terror throughout the mile long stretch of land.
     "Then again, I only get half of that money," Rikku said to herself.

<Shinra & Rufus: Father/Son, Edgar: Assistant, Currently in 2nd>
     "I remember this thing," Edgar said as the large aircraft loomed overhead.
     "Thanks for telling us," Rufus said. He fired his shotgun at the left missile, but it remained intact and fired a counterattack that blew holes in the ground at Rufus's feet.
     "How do we kill it?" Shinra asked.
     "Not sure," Edgar said. "Sabin did it for us. Something about using lightning though."
     "I don't have any materia," Rufus said.
     "Well that thing that Shinra keeps shooting is a magic absorbing speck," Edgar explained. "If you can't use magic, then just leave it alone."
     "Got it," Shinra said. He ignored the new speck and continued to fire at the ship's main body, just as Rufus was. Edgar used his auto crossbow to fire at all targets continuously. The ship shot several attacks back at them, but the three boys anticipated its attacks as Edgar continued to explain the details of the machine.
     "Would you quit talking and kill it?" Rufus said to Edgar.
     "Fine," Edgar said. He reached into his bag and pulled out a giant power drill. "Let's rock."
     Rufus and Shinra gave Edgar cover fire while he ran beneath the ship and began drilling into the bottom. The driver in the back screamed as a long spilling drill bit came through the floor and went straight between his legs and fell just slightly short of impaling his chin.
     "Cdub! Cdub! Oui feh!" the driver shouted. He moved the ship high, then landed it beside the boys. Rufus and Shinra both took a final potshot at the ship before the driver stepped out. He ran to them, waving his arms wildly. Both Shinras put their guns away and waited for the approaching man holding their clue.
     "I guess we won," Rufus said. Rufus took the clue and read it. "Stop sign."
     "I assumed as much," Edgar said.
     "Thanks for your help," Rufus said. He extended his hand to Edgar. Edgar shook it.
     "Good luck you two," Edgar said. "Now hurry! Those girls are way ahead!"
     "Right, thanks!" Rufus said. He spun around and ran in the direction that Yuna and Rikku had run. Shinra followed him, but stopped him and pulled him into the travel agency. The room was a large circle with a circular desk on the far wall. The receptionist was also obviously an Al Bhed.
     Shinra looked around and grabbed a small map off the wall. He held it up to the receptionist. "Free?" he asked.
     "Ev oui fyhd du nup sa," she responded.
     "I'd assume that means yes," Rufus said.
     "Me too," Shinra said. He tossed a few gil in the ground and walked out. "Just to be safe," he said to Rufus.
     Shinra looked at the map while he and Rufus jogged to Macalania Woods.

<Amarant & Lani: Coworkers, Jecht: Assistant, Currently in Last>
     "I can do hopscotch," Lani said.
     "Giving up?" Amarant said.
     "Other teams don't have a retarded chicken," Lani said. "They're all probably waaaaaay past us now."
     "And if they're not?"
     "Then we'll gut 'em and steal the money."
     "Guys?" Jecht said. He tried to flag them down, but the two were staring at a single Macalania sphere in a pillar. "Guys? You wanna open your clue?"
     "You got it!?" Lani screamed. A revitalizing wave ran through her as she hopped to her feet and ran to the treasure box.
     "Last place or first place, we need to run and fast!" Amarant said.
     "No time to waste, let's go," Jecht said. He chuckled. "Damn Auron. I can't get that out of my head anymore."

<Rikku & Yuna: Cousins, Currently in 1st>
     "Made it!" Rikku shouted. "And no sign of other teams!"
     "Are we in first?" Yuna asked.
     "I hope so!"
     Yuna and Rikku walked into the underground city of Guadosalam. They approached the large fancy building in the corner. In front of the building was a clue box, which Rikku dove into like a child diving for the toy in a cereal box.
     "Roadblock: Who remembers the past?" Rikku read.
     "I guess me," Yuna said.

<Announcer Gippal>
     "A roadblock is a task that only one team member may perform. In this roadblock, teams must go to the farplane of Guadosalam: a place known for remembering fallen friends and seeing their images. In a similar fashion, teams must remember all of the fallen racers. Because they are not deceased, they will not appear on the farplane, but replicas will be provided. Then, they will be given a card with the picture of each of the greeters welcoming teams at the mats, which they must match to each team when they were eliminated. For example, they must match Owzer to Sephiroth and Jenova. Once they have matched all the teams, they will receive their next clue."

<Rikku & Yuna: Cousins, Currently in 1st>
     "You can do it, Yunie!" Rikku said.
     "I hope so!" Yuna said. She ran around the spiraling paths of Guadosalam and down the long narrow tunnel leading to the farplane. Yuna did not bother looking at the endless waterfalls and pyreflies surrounding the circular platform she now stood on. The tunnel leading to the platform seemed to no longer exist.
     Yuna ran to the center of the platform, where a table with three stacks of cards sat. She grabbed one and looked at the image of the cloud puff Mallow.
     "I can do this," Yuna said. "I think. Maybe it was the knights?" She ran to a cardboard cutout of Steiner and Beatrix and saw a small protruding box where she could slide a card inside. She slid the picture of Mallow into it and continued to look for more cutouts to place her next card: Evil Robot Horace.

<Shinra & Rufus: Father/Son>
     "Creepy," Rufus said. He took a few steps through the Thunder Plains and stopped to look back at Shinra, who was walking slowly with his hand on his chest. "Million gil doesn't do much for you, does it?"
     "One day you'll get some meat on your scrawny bones and understand it," Shinra said. He wheezed a bit, then started to jog again.
     "Oh please. I'll never eat anything with the human vacuum eating everything before I even smell it."
     "You smell it," Shinra said. "You have the Shinra nose."
     "That doesn't matter, I still don't get the food. You're too fast."
     "Who, this old man?" Shinra said. He burst into a sprint and passed Rufus.
     "No fair! You have momentum on your side!" Rufus joined him in sprinting through the Thunder Plains.

     Yuna put a card with a picture of Dalton on the cutouts of Fujin and Raijin and proceeded to the center of the platform where a man dressed in all black greeted her. 
     "You're the Amazing Final Fantasy Race Ninja, aren't you?" Yuna said.
     "You have a good memory," the man said. "Surely you have done well. Press the button on the table to see how many matches you have."
     A button rose from the center of the table. Yuna pressed it and a number '5' lit up in pyreflies.
     "Only half are correct," the Amazing Final Fantasy Race Ninja said. "Revise your choices and submit again."
     "Not right?" Yuna asked. "Okay, thank you." Yuna walked around to the cutouts and pondered each of her choices.

<Shinra & Rufus: Father/Son>
     The Shinras ran into Guadosalam and retrieved their clue. 
     "Roadblock," Rufus read. "I'll do it."
     "Do well, son," Shinra said.
     "I will," Rufus said. He ran to the farplane to see Yuna looking at a giant '7' in the sky.
     "Good luck, Yuna," Rufus said to Yuna as he approached the table. He grabbed his own deck of cards and began putting them in the cutouts designated for his team. They stood to the left of Yuna's team's cutouts.
     "Okay, the fat man was the first leg," Rufus said. "Sephiroth was cut, so he gets the fat guy." Rufus stuck a card of Owzer in Sephiroth and Jenova's card slot. "The Japanese guy was.... Lani and Am- wait, no, it was non-elimination I thought..." Rufus stood and stared at the card of Maeda for a moment.
     Yuna ran to the cutout of Edgar and Sabin and pulled the picture of Johnny out of it. She replaced it with the picture of Evil Robot Horace. She then went to the cutout of Tifa and Paine and removed the picture of Arvis and replaced it with the Johnny picture. She lost her concentration when suddenly a giant '8' lit up in the sky.
     "Hope that means I only have two swapped," Rufus said.

     Rikku and Shinra waited outside the farplane side by side. Both held their backpacks as if ready to sprint off at any moment.
     "Wonder where the other ones are," Rikku asked Shinra.
     "Lani and Amarant?" he asked. "I'm not sure. I'm hoping behind us."
     "I'm hoping far behind us," Rikku said. "They could make a serious comeback you know."

<Amarant & Lani: Coworkers, Jecht: Assistant>
     "And don't come back!" Jecht yelled at the falling aircraft.
     The pilot exited the ship and approached Lani with a clue extended.
     "Thanks," she read the clue. "Okay, stop sign. Take a hike old man."
     Lani and Amarant ran ahead to the travel agency and left Jecht without another word.
     "Those two suck," Jecht said as he walked away.

     A large '10' lit up in the sky. The Amazing Final Fantasy Race Ninja handed a clue to Rufus.
     "Yes!" Rufus shouted. He ran out of the farplane and met up with Shinra, who quickly joined him in running down the tunnel a good distance before stopping to read the clue.
     Shinra ripped open the clue and read it aloud. "Find your next clue by a tower in the Thunder Plains."

<Announcer Gippal>
     "Teams must now search the Thunder Plains for one of the stones with a picture of a creature known as the cactuar- or qactuar- painted on the side. Beside these stones is their next clue."

     "A '10'!" Yuna shouted. The Amazing Final Fantasy Race Ninja handed her a clue. She ran outside and collected Rikku before proceeding to the Thunder Plains.
     "There's the boys!" Rikku shouted. Yuna and Rikku ran quickly and caught up to the Shinras, then passed them as they ran into the Thunder Plains.
     "Please tell me you saw one of these 'qactuar stones' on the way in here," Rufus said to Shinra.
     "I did as a matter of fact," Shinra said. "There were a few to the right of us, which would be our left this direction."
     "Thanks, noisy," Rikku said. She tugged Yuna to the left and the two sprinted away from the Shinras.
     "But seriously," Rufus said. "Did you see any?"
     "Way toward the other end," Shinra said.
     "Cool, let's hurry. And try to look angry at the girls."

     "There's the other teams!" Lani shouted at Amarant. While still running at a decent speed, she hopped along and removed her shoe, then hit Amarant in the back of the head with it. "We're losing so bad now!"
     "Unless they're lost and going in the wrong direction, which would put us into first," Amarant said.
     "Hey!" Lani shouted at the Shinras. "You lost? Or did you already go to Guadosalam?"
     "Already did it," Rufus said. 
     "Damnhole!" Lani shouted. She hit Amarant with her shoe again. "Maybe we still have a chance. Maybe a meteor will kill the other two teams!"
     "Start praying," Amarant said.

     "Found one!" Rikku shouted.
     Yuna ran quickly to Rikku and sat beside a stone with a small cactus man carved into the side of it. They examined the stone and found a clue taped to the back of it.
     "How the hell did Mr. Shinra find this?" Rikku asked. "It was mega hidden! Took forever just to find it, and we were looking for it, but before he just.... He's scary observant."
     "Mmhmm," Yuna said, not listening to Rikku. She was busy opening the clue. She pulled the clue out and read it. "Oh! Rikku! It says umm... Make your way on foot to the finish line at the Calm Lands!"

<Announcer Gippal>
     "Teams must now travel on foot to the historic Calm Lands. The Calm Lands has been known for ending many epic battles, and now it will end one epic race. In the center of the Calm Lands awaits the finish line for the Amazing Final Fantasy Race. The first team to cross will win one-million gil."

<Rikku & Yuna: Cousins>
     "Go girl, go!" Rikku shouted at Yuna. Both jumped up and began running the length of the Thunder Plains.

<Shinra & Rufus: Father/Son>
     "Found it," Rufus said. He found the clue taped to the back of the stone and ripped it open. "Finish line is at the Calm Lands!" he yelled to Shinra.
     Shinra pulled out his map and quickly searched for the Calm Lands. "Perfect," he said. "Hurry, this way." Shinra led Rufus by running out of the Thunder Plains, back to Macalania Woods. "We don't need these," he said as he hurled his backpack into a trashcan nearby. 
     Rufus followed suit and threw his backpack away. "Why is this perfect?"
     "Because the girls are behind us," Shinra explained while running. "Even if they found a stone they're guaranteed to be behind us."
     "Cool," Rufus said. "Now stop talking and run. Save your breath. You'll need it."
     Shinra nodded and ran forward with his nose buried in his map. He looked up when the path got tricky, but on straight-aways he kept looking at the map for shortcuts.

     "I see the boys!" Rikku shouted from a high branch of the Macalania Woods. She and Yuna ran along a twisting branch while Rufus and Shinra took a lower path.
     "Should we be down where they are?" Yuna asked.
     "Not a chance," Rikku said. "If they're right, we can simply jump down and catch up. We can beat them in a footrace after all. But if I'm right and we need to be up here, then we've already won."
     "Good thinking, Rikku!" Yuna said. 

     "Why're they on those branches?" Rufus asked Shinra.
     "Why the hell are you looking backwards, Rufus?" Shinra asked. "Run your own race and leave the girls alone."
     "Just making sure we're not going to make asses of ourselves and get out navigated by those two."
     "Still," Shinra said. He exited the woods and both ran around a stone canyon wall and onto a grassy plateau. A ledge ahead of them overlooked the large grassy plains of the Calm Lands, complete with a large red mat in the center. The yellow letters, even at a long distance, clearly spelled out "The Amazing Final Fantasy Race."
     "It's ours!" Rufus yelled. He started to look back again, but stopped and just ran forward. He and Shinra reached the edge of the cliffside and stopped to analyze the situation while catching their breath.
     "It slopes to the left," Shinra said. "I'm no mountaineer, but you make the call, son. Climb down or run down the slope?" 
     "Slope," Rufus said quickly. Both quickly ran to the left down the slope and off the direct path to the finish line.

     "Hurry, Yunie!" Rikku shouted. "We're almost there! I can see it!"
     "Think we can win?" Yuna asked.
     "Of course we can! Just think positively and move your tushie!"
     Yuna and Rikku rounded the corner of the stone canyon and came out on top of the plateau. Neither bothered to think and both immediately began sliding down the canyon wall. Dust flew up from their shoes and rocks flew at their faces, but both went down shoes first with a hand behind them to steady them. Both hit the ground and took off running.

     "Do you move any faster?" Rufus yelled to Shinra. He again made the mistake of looking back instead of forward.
     Shinra slapped Rufus on the back of the head and pointed forward. "Just run!"

     "Hurry, Yunie!" Rikku whined. "It's so close!"
     "Where are the boys?" Yuna panted as tears streamed out of her eyes. "I can't even see them right now."
     "Just keep running forward!" Rikku ordered. "I'll tell you what you're missing later."

     The eight previously eliminated teams lined the way to the finish mat. To the left, Steiner and Beatrix clapped loudly and stood tall, directly across from Fujin and Raijin, who opted to not clap and instead stick their hands in their mouths and whistle. Further in, beside Beatrix stood Tifa and Paine. Paine stood tall and applauded while Tifa smiled and pointed while nudging Paine. Beside Fujin were Edgar and Sabin. Both stood tall and applauded with more regality than anybody had ever expected anybody to see from them. Sephiroth stood beside Edgar, but instead of clapping he was simply restraining Jenova, who seemed to believe herself to be the winner. Across from Sephiroth was a mess of four people as Rinoa and Relm both fought over Squall with Relm clinging to his right leg and Rinoa hanging on his left arm. Squall and Strago simply applauded.

     Gippal stood on the middle of an oversized mat and made way for the approaching team as they made their way onto the mat.
     Gippal began his speech with a large smile on his face. "Eight galaxies, seventeen worlds, countless miles, Shinra and Rufus, you are the official winners of The Amazing Final Fantasy Race!"
     "Holy crap," Rufus said. His knees started to buckle and he fell to the ground. He smiled widely and laughed. "I think I'm going to have a heart attack."
     "You are?" Shinra said. "I've never run so much in my life! I lost like thirty pounds just getting from that cliff to here!"
     Rufus stood up and gave Shinra a tight bear hug. "I can't believe we did it, Dad."
     "You could've done this easily without me, son," Shinra said. "Without me weighting you down-"
     "No weighting down. You won this for us too."
     Yuna and Rikku ran up on the mat and hugged Rufus around the neck. Yuna gave him a quick kiss on the cheek. 
     "Good race," Rikku said. She extended her hand to Shinra.
     "Excellent racing, ladies," Shinra said. He grabbed Rikku around the waist and yanked her into the air for a tight hug, despite her not hugging back and more flailing for air. He put Rikku down and shook Gippal's hand.
     Rufus approached Gippal and shook his hand as well.
     "Hugs all around!" Rufus shouted as he beckoned for all the other teams to come on the raised mat. All the teams ran up on the mat to congratulate Rufus and Shinra. 
     "About that check," Shinra said to Gippal.
     "Baralai has it," Gippal said. "Go kick his butt for it. If he hasn't taken off with it."
     The teams all shook each others' hands and hugged each other while Gippal turned his back on the group and faced the camera.
     "Hope you all enjoyed watching the first season of The Amazing Final Fantasy Race," Gippal said to the camera. "Stay tuned and keep giving us ratings for our next season. We'll see if we can't make it even more exciting than this display right here." He waved at the camera. "Good night. See you in a few months." Before the camera cut out, Yuna and Rikku both dove onto Gippal and brought him to the ground with two unexpected hugs.
     "You can't hide from us like that!" Rikku shouted.
     "High Summoner's decree!" Yuna shouted at him. "Hug the runner-ups!"
     "Till next time," Gippal waved to the camera over Yuna and Rikku. The camera faded to black on Rufus and Shinra, who stood shoulder to shoulder, each with an arm around the other. Both smiled more than anybody had ever seen a Shinra smile publicly. 

     The camera clicked back on to show a couple sitting by a tower in the Thunder Plains.

<Amarant & Lani: Coworkers, Third Place Losers>
     Lani and Amarant simply sat by a lightning tower and threw rocks into a nearby puddle.
     "This race was stupid anyway," Amarant said.
     "Yeah, f@*k this race," Lani said.