Episode 5: Part 3

     Fran and Balthier attempted the Mail Delivery once again, this time making it look like child's play. Balthier gave the letters to all the humans while Fran handled the birds. They received confirmation to move on and quickly headed to Poster Duty to join up with Brahne and Garnet.

     "Biran smash!" Biran shouted as he bashed the ball at Yenke.
     "Yenke smash!" Yenke shouted as he bashed the ball at Biran.
     "Oh my God," a man in the crowd said. "Do they really have to say that every time?"
     "Biran smash!"
     "Yenke smash!"
     "Please drop it soon!" people in the crowd began shouting.
     "Biran smash!"
     "Yenke smash!" Yenke missed his smash and the ball flew over his shoulder and hit the ground.
     "Thank goodness," the man said. He handed the Ronso their third set of 50 munny. "Forty-nine in a row. And we're so glad it's over."
     "Biran never dropped ball," Biran said. "Only Yenke dropped ball! Yenke is horrible Hulk-Ronso."
     The Ronso ran the direction Dona and Barthello had run, hoping it was the way to the Sandlot.

<Ma & Zell: Mother/Son, Currently in 3rd Place>
     Zell and Ma reached the Sandlot and saw Dona getting smacked around the stage. Zell laughed, but Ma elbowed him and told him to never laugh at a woman getting hurt. They found Hayner and handed him the 150 munny. He pointed them to the U-Turn mat beside them.
     "We umm, can't U-Turn," Zell said to the camera. "Poor Frat-Rat."
     Hayner handed them their clue, which Ma opened up. "Who's struggling to win?"
     "What do you think, Ma?" Zell asked. He and Ma watched Dona getting thrown around the ring. "I could do it, but I've done more roadblocks than you."
     They watched Dona struggle to Struggle a bit longer, noticing that she would definitely not win with this attempt. "I want to do it," Ma finally said. "I can at least do it faster than Dona... I hope."
     "Kick ass, Ma! Ma versus Dona!"
     "Language, Zelly!" Ma said. "But yes, I'll kick her umm, booty."

     "Nineteen, twenty, twenty-one, twenty-two!" Faris and Reina chanted as they batted the ball back and forth.
     "Wait, we hit twenty!" Faris said. "Drop it, we has enough booty!"
     Reina purposely missed her hit and the ball hit the ground.
     "Congrats," a man said. He handed them the last 50 munny they needed and they raced off to find the Sandlot.

     With Dona's loss in the Struggle, it was Ma's turn. She wore her velcro vest and entered the ring with Setzer. She armed herself with the foam bat and squared off in the center as the crowd counted them down. "Three, two, one, Struggle!"
     Ma raced at Setzer with a fiery intensity in her eyes. She pulled back her bat and lashed out at Setzer, only to miss entirely.
     "Oh, Ma," Zell said, shaking his head.
     Setzer smiled at her as she tried her next attack, which failed just as much. Setzer barely even moved to evade her attacks. She finally landed a hit on his coat, knocking a couple balls loose, which she quickly picked up. Right after she'd grabbed them, he knocked them right back out of her grasp. It was only just before the man called "Time!" that Ma landed a decent blow on Setzer.
     Ma retreated to her corner with Zell, who gave her a water bottle while she waited. "Do you need me to tell you what you did wrong?" Zell asked her.
     "I think I know, but tell me," Ma said.
     "Your eyes," Zell said. "Keep them-"
     "Open, yes. Thank you, Zelly. You're so sweet to your mother, even if she's ruining your chances at one million gil."
     "Don't worry, we're still ahead," Zell said.

     "Posters look good," the man told Garnet and Brahne. Garnet smiled and accepted the 150 munny while Brahne huffed and wheezed from running around with posters. Garnet motioned for Brahne to follow her as she trotted on ahead, but Brahne only waved for her to keep going as she doubled over for air.
     "I can't leave you," Garnet said to Brahne. "We can wait though."

     "Go, Dona, go! Go, Dona, go!" the crowd chanted after Barthello riled them up.
     "The audience has turned on me," Setzer said with a smirk.
     Dona charged at him, then hit him across the chest. A few red balls flew out, then a padded bat collided with Dona and sent her flying across the stage.

     "Biran want to fight!" Biran yelled as they entered the Sandlot, having gotten slightly lost. They gave the money to Hayner, then stood on the U-Turn mat.
     "Cannot U-Turn," Yenke said. "Already used it on Hair-Horn!"
     They returned to Hayner and opened their clue. "Roadblock," Biran read. "Who not Yenke?"
     "That Biran!" Yenke answered. "Waaaait. Clue not say that!"
     "Clue say: 'Who struggle to win?' It the same thing as 'Who not Yenke?' because Biran will do it."

     Dona once again headed off the stage in defeat as Ma took the stage. She readied her bat as the crowd counted her down. "Three, two, one, Struggle!" She ran at Setzer and as he struck out at her, she hit his wrist and knocked the bat from his hands. He tried to reach for it when she clubbed him again in the stomach, then the butt as he was bent over. Red balls fell all over the stage and Ma quickly raced for them. She counted as she attached them to her vest and when she reached thirty, she looked up to see Setzer standing over her with his bat. He struck her in the back, knocking several of the balls off her vest and out of her hands. She scurried to pick them up as the timer sounded.
     "Final count," the ringmaster said counting the final balls. "The final count is only eighteen."
     "No!" Zell shouted. "Aww, come on!"
     Ma took her place on the sidelines as Biran took the stage, now wearing the velcro vest and holding a foam-less bat. A stagehand ran on the stage to help Biran reassemble his bat and inform him that the foam is for safety, not a flaw in the weapon.

     "Good?" Balthier said to the man administrating poster duty.
     The man's eyes followed Fran's legs as she slowly crawled down from a high location, where she had just placed a poster. "Very good. Here's your munny." He handed Balthier the 150 munny.
     "Careful not to stare. She does bite."
     Fran smirked, then joined Balthier in running for the Sandlot.

     Reina and Faris reached the Sandlot in time to see Biran run up to Setzer, clobber him, and collect several red balls as Setzer regained his senses. Reina handed Hayner the munny. Hayner pointed them to the U-Turn.
     "Should we?" Reina asked.
     "Nay, it be too early," Faris said. She took the clue from Hayner and read it. "Who be strugglin' ter win?"
     "Probably me?" Reina said. "But that looks brutal out there!"
     "Aye, but look at yer competition." Faris pointed to the bench, where Dona and Ma waited for their next attempts. "Also," Faris said, turning Reina to see the next two people approaching: Garnet and Brahne. "Yeh c'n do it."
     "I can do it!" Reina said, jumping into the preparation area to get her velcro vest on.

     Garnet and Brahne finally reached Hayner and handed him the munny, then looked at the U-Turn.
     "We choose not-" Garnet started, but Brahne stopped her.
     "We have a glorious opportunity, dearie," Brahne said. "I see several teams ahead of us, but I don't believe the Pretty Boy has passed us, nor those two men in suits."
     "Those are the two top teams," Garnet said. "We really could take one out."
     "Wait!" Balthier shouted as he and Fran entered the Sandlot. "We'll make you a deal, should you not U-Turn us."
     "We're listening!" Brahne shouted.
     "If you choose not to U-Turn us, we shall use our U-Turn on Reno and Rude," Balthier explained. "A 'top team,' as you say, is struggling, yet you will retain your delay point, having not used it here."
     "It's a good deal," Brahne said.
     "Even for the APBA," Garnet said.
     "The what?" Fran asked.
     "Anti-Pretty Boy Alliance," Brahne informed her. She turned to Garnet, who seemed embarrased and annoyed that her mother had given the small secret away. "It was no use hiding it anymore."
     "Yes, hiding it," Balthier said. "So what'll it be? We haven't got long. We both need to line up for this roadblock that seems to be going...rather poorly."
     Garnet and Brahne quietly discussed it. Finally, they agreed upon a decision. "We choose not to U-Turn," Garnet told the camera.
     "Atta girl," Balthier said. He and Fran handed their munny to Hayner and moved to the U-Turn mat as instructed.
     "We do choose to U-Turn," Balthier said as Fran dug through the pictures.
     "Them," she added, holding up a picture of Reno and Rude for the camera. She stuck it on the board with a picture of themselves in the "U-Turned by" section.
     Both Garnet and Balthier opened up their clues from Hayner together and read through the clue. "Roadblock: Who's struggling to win?"
     "I will, I will!" Brahne shouted. "I've been waiting to hit something!"
     "I shall, as well," Fran said. "Seems to be a women's event today."

     "What's the count?" Reno asked Rude as they easily batted the ball between the two of them at the 'Stand' detour.
     "About 150," Rude replied.
     "Maybe we should drop it to see how much munny we got, y'know?"
     Rude nodded, then sidestepped the ball as it came to him and allowed it to hit the ground.
     "Ooooh," the crowd said.
     "That's quite a bit!" a man said excitedly. He walked up to Reno and handed him 100 munny. "Normally, we only give 50 for anything over 20 hits, but we gave you a bonus for making it over 100!"
     Reno snapped at the man as he pulled the munny from his hands. "So we just did fifty hits for nothing!?"
     "I.... I guess so! We don't have a bigger prize than that."
     "Relax," Rude said to Reno. "Just do twenty-one this time."
     "Yeah, yeah," Reno said. "At least we stopped when we did."

     Biran stood with his arms held high as the crowd cheered for the announcer, who just counted the twentieth ball. He handed Biran his clue, which Biran took and ran off stage to join Yenke. He ripped it open and read it. "Make way to Pit Stop at mansion. Only use Ronso legs. One team probably eliminated."
     "Ha ha!" Yenke laughed. "Humans going to lose because they not have Ronso legs!"
     Biran hit Yenke over the head. "Biran was paraphrasing! Now come, Yenke the Idiot."
     Biran and Yenke headed out of the Sandlot to find the Pit Stop at the mansion.

     Dona took the stage once again, but once again was beaten easily by Setzer. She left the stage and Ma climbed up. She ran at Setzer and cried out, "Booya!" as she struck him in a downward motion with the bat. Then, as he was hunched over from the attack, she yelled, "Bat Rush!" and struck him again, this time in an upward motion. She scurried around to pick up balls as Setzer got his senses about him and rushed to get the balls back. He was about ready to knock them all off her, when she gave him a quick poke to distract him and the announcer called for time.
     The announcer counted up the balls, then handed Ma her clue. She read it to Zell. "Make your way on foot to the Pit Stop at the mansion outside of town. Warning: the last team to check in may be eliminated."
     "I think I saw that when we did Poster Duty," Zell said. "Follow me!"
     Ma and Zell raced off to Station Heights in search of the hole leading to the mansion.

     "There!" Reno said, spiking the ball into the ground. "Munny, please." He held out his hand to the crowd. An old man gave them the 50 munny they needed, which they quickly grabbed out of his hand and headed off in pursuit of Hayner and the Sandlot.

     Reina began her assault on Setzer and was doing decently at holding her own. She'd knock off a few balls and collect some, but Setzer would grab others. As they continued their match, Brahne and Dona moved closer together and started whispering to each other. It was hard to understand exactly what they were saying, but Dona at one point was heard mocking Reina for not grabbing enough of the red balls, which Brahne chuckled at. The announcer finally counted the balls Reina had collected. She came up three balls short.

     Gippal waited at the Pit Stop mat and pointed to the approaching team. They ran up and stood on the mat.
     "Welcome to Twilight Town," Namine said.
     "Ma and Zell," Gippal said, "you're team number two!"
     "Get the heck out!" Zell responded happily. "Two!?"
     "Two," Gippal repeated.
     Zell hugged Ma so tight that he lifted her off the ground.
     "But what happened to Biran and Yenke?" Ma asked.

<Biran & Yenke: Comrades, Currently in 3rd Place>
     Biran and Yenke continued to search Station Heights for the crack in the wall, just as they had been for the past little while. The area was huge and the Ronso unfortunately had started their search on the exact opposite side.
     "Biran blames Yenke," Biran said. "Mansions are big! Biran should have seen it by now, but Yenke is doing something to Biran's brain to make him not see it!"
     "Yenke cannot do these things!" Yenke argued. "As said in ancient scriptures: 'Ronso not able to have heads messed with as long as mighty horn exists.'"
     "It true. Biran is sorry for going against the teachings. Biran has very mighty horn."

     Brahne took her turn at the Struggle. She faced off with Setzer and charged at him with a tremendous force. Unfortunately, speed was not her strong suit. Setzer was able to easily evade her attacks. After a minute of screams and attacks that would have otherwise beaten him senseless, the Struggle ended and Brahne had never hit him once.
     "Oh dear," Garnet said from the sidelines.

<Reno & Rude: Partners, Currently in Last Place>
     Reno and Rude reached Hayner and handed him the munny. Hayner motioned to the U-Turn sign. "Sorry, guys."
     "We expected it," Rude said. He watched intently as Fran walked on stage for her Struggle attempt, but only for a split second as Reno pulled him away and pointed him toward the 'Deliver' detour area.

     Fran delivered a series of blows to Setzer. He also fought back and got some hits in, but Fran had yet to pick up any of the red balls. She counted to herself as she attacked, then, at fifty, she dove down and grabbed as many balls as she could and stuck them on her vest. When time was called, the announcer counted her up, then handed her a clue. She left the stage to join with Balthier, then ripped open the clue and read it.
     "No time to waste," Balthier said. "Very good job, by the way."
     "Thank you," Fran said. They made their way to Station Heights to find the hole leading to the mansion.

     Gippal watched the next set of approaching team members as they walked to the Pit Stop mat and stepped on. Namine welcomed them, then looked to Gippal.
     "Biran and Yenke," Gippal said, "you're team number three!"
     "That Ronso record!" Yenke noted.
     "It sure is," Gippal said.

<Reno & Rude: Partners, Currently in Last Place>
     Reno and Rude waited on their skateboards on the top of the incline, waiting for the man to count them down. "Three, two, one, go!" Reno had faster reflexes on the skateboard and shot down the incline. He threw letters to every person and animal that he passed to ensure he was not missing anything. Rude used the same strategy, even on people that Reno had already thrown a letter to. At the end of the incline, Reno spun around quickly and headed to the section on the side with several people, including the final girl requiring a letter. Rude, on the other hand, stayed straight and threw a final wad of several letters at the bird above him.
     "Time!" the man shouted. "Five out of five, move on to Poster Duty."
     "This detour is weird," Reno said as they headed to Station Heights for Poster Duty. "It's almost like we're doing three detours with this U-Turn thing, y'know? The ball, the mail, and now the posters? Geez."

     Dona fought once again against Setzer. She still failed to land any hits until suddenly, Brahne started jumping up and down and shouting, "Hurry and beat her already! I wanna fiiiiiight!" Setzer lost his footing from the sudden jumping of Brahne. Dona was unaffected by her jumps and used the opportunity to take a couple cheap shots at Setzer, knocking several of his red balls free. He regained his composure and after a quick glare at Brahne, he went after Dona, who was covering herself in balls. Setzer rose his bat to strike at her back, which held many of the balls, when suddenly, he stumbled again due to Brahne's resumed jumping and shouting. "Get her, get her, get her!"
     "Time!" the announcer proclaimed. He counted up the balls, ending the count at exactly twenty. He handed Dona her clue, which she took to Barthello.
     "Very good, Dona!" Barthello said happily. He took the clue and ripped it open to read it to her. "Make your way on foot to the Pit Stop at the mansion outside of town. Warning: the last team to check in may be eliminated." He looked up from the clue and pointed to Station Heights. "Most teams went that way. We should hurry."
     "Hold your horses, Barthello," Dona said. "I've been knocked around so much, I need a rest and stretch."
     "I could carry you," Barthello suggested.
     "Just drop it, Barthello. We still have a team that hasn't shown up. We'll be fine."
     "Yes, ma'am."

     Fran and Balthier exited the small forest and found the mansion, where Gippal waited.
     "Fran and Balthier," Gippal said, "you're team number four!"
     "Not bad," Balthier noted.
     "Not good, either," Fran added.
     "True."

     Reina took her second attempt at fighting Setzer. She went nearly blow for blow, but copying Fran's strategy, she left the balls on the ground until near the end. Several blows later, she dove on the ground and, in addition to grabbing balls, she also rolled on top of some of them. They stuck to her vest in addition to the ones she collected herself as they called for time. The announcer counted her up, then handed her a clue.
     "Thank you," she said to the announcer. She turned to Setzer. "And to you."
     Setzer bowed. "I'm rather enjoying playing with so money women. They rarely enter The Struggle."
     Reina met up with Faris and read her clue.
     "None of these look like mansions," Reina said. "Maybe we should look there?" Reina pointed toward the train station.
     "Nay, the rest of the teams have gone thataway," Faris said, pointing to Station Heights. "I imagine we'll find something thar."
     "Okay." The girls headed in the direction of Station Heights and both gave Dona a strange look as they ran past. Dona and Barthello were still in the Sandlot, waiting for Dona to rest and stretch.

     Reno slapped up a poster and took the 150 munny from the man checking posters. He threw it in his pocket and ran to the Sandlot with Rude. As they entered the area, they saw Brahne walking on stage to try yet again. They continued to Hayner and handed him another 150 munny.
     "There you go," Reno said. "Double the asking price. Don't say we never did nothing for you, y'know?"
     Hayner handed them their clue, which Rude quickly opened. "Roadblock: Who's struggling to win?"
     "Who's not?" Reno joked. "I'll do it. Stick combat is my thing."
     "Yes," Rude agreed.
     Reno began putting on his vest as he waited for Brahne's fight, which was going in the typical Brahne fashion: strong hits, but all missing. Garnet waited nearby and held her head high, actively supporting her mother. But yet, there was a definite sense of defeat in her.

     "Barthello, I need your help," Dona said. "I need to stretch my back out. Would you lift me with those big ugly hands of yours so I can stretch more freely?"
     Barthello nodded, then lifted Dona in the air, holding her up by her waist. She stretched her arms above her head, then brought them down and laced her fingers together, palms facing the ground, then stretched in a seductive manner, all the while making sure to push her breasts together with her arms and thrusting her whole chest forward. Several of the men in the area noticed, most notably Setzer, who took a split second to check her out. Unfortunately, that was just enough time for him to completely forget about Brahne. He turned his attention back to her just in time to get clobbered by a very powerful, momentum-filled hit. The red balls exploded from his chest as he flew backwards. Brahne picked up balls uninterrupted as Setzer was struggling to even get to his feet. The announcer finally shouted, "Time!" and began to count the red balls.
     "She has....." the announcer started. He counted the balls silently to himself. "Twenty-three balls!" The crowd cheered as he handed Brahne her clue. She joined Garnet and read the clue together, then they moved toward Dona, who had been put back on the ground in the meantime.
     "It's this way," Brahne said, pointing toward Station Heights.
     "Thanks," Dona said. "Let's please get a move on. Reno and Rude are not ones to be taken lightly."
     "Umm, what's going on?" Garnet asked her mother. She got no reply as the four moved together toward Station Heights.

     "Listen," Rude told Reno as he started up the stage. "I heard of a loophole in this Roadblock. If you can knock your opponent out, the fight ends and you win instantly. No rules broken."
     "No kidding," Reno responded. "I'll be sure to make quick work of this then."
     Reno ran on stage and started waving his arms for Setzer to join him in the center. He then waved his hands for the audience to start, which they did. "Three, two, one, Struggle!"
     Setzer moved in for the first hit, but Reno ducked his attack, then jumped in the air and hit him on the left side of his head. Setzer was disoriented, but very much still conscious; that is, until the second and third blows to the exact same spot. Setzer's body went limp and fell to the ground.
     "Clue, please!" Reno shouted playfully to the announcer over the silence of the crowd.
     "Yeah, our winner," the announcer said. He handed Reno the clue. Reno handed him back a small vial of smelling salts.
     "That should wake him right up," Reno informed him. "It's an essential part of the Turk utility belt."
     He jumped off the stage and read the clue to Rude very quickly. "Make your way on foot to the Pit Stop at the mansion outside of town. Warning: the last team to check in may be eliminated."
     "I know where it is," Rude said.

     "I see him!" Reina shouted from the forest. She and Faris ran forward and hopped on the Pit Stop mat.
     "Reina and Faris," Gippal said, "you're team number five!"
     "Good, we didn't get too lost then," Reina said with a smile.
     "Live ter fight another day," Faris said.

     "This way," Garnet said, pointing to the hole in the wall. They headed through and found themselves in a small forest. They continued to walk with Dona and Barthello, but having found the hole in the wall, Dona and Barthello began walking at a much faster pace and broke off from Brahne and Garnet. Both groups suddenly found, however, that the forest was harder to navigate than they'd originally thought. They set off in two different directions, only to find themselves both reaching the end of the forest and having to turn back.

     Reno and Rude ran through the hole in the wall that Rude had spotted during Poster Duty and looked around for the Pit Stop. Rude, having already made the mistake once, chose to actually take his sunglasses off in the dark forest. He pointed to a small break in the forest, where a light reflected off a white mansion, then motioned for Reno to follow him.

     Gippal waited by the Pit Stop mat. He pointed to the approaching team as they ran up and stood on the mat.
     "Dona and Barthello," Gippal said, "you're team number six!" He looked up from Dona and Barthello and waved his hand toward the mat. "Come on in here, you two."
     The next team made their way to the mat and stood beside Barthello.
     "Brahne and Garnet, you're team number seven!" Gippal announced.
     "Oh, dearie me, it was so tough," Brahne said.
     "I'm confused," Gippal said. "Particularly with you, Dona. It seems you more or less helped Brahne with her Roadblock by distracting Setzer."
     "It was his fault for looking," Dona said. "I just needed to stretch and-"
     "Come on. Nobody stretches like that. Nor does anybody need to be lifted above the crowd to do provocative stretching like that. Come clean."
     "Yes, please do," Garnet said. "I''m so confused."
     "We've formed a secret alliance, dearie," Brahne explained. "Dona and I. On the train. You and Barthello each went to the restroom, so we began talking. We were afraid you'd be against it."
     "Dona, is this true?" Barthello asked.
     "Yes," Dona said. "Brahne came up with a plan to knock out other teams. Any team would do, but our target was Reno and Rude."
     "Really?" Garnet asked. "But they did us a favor before when-"
     "Queen Brahne Alexandros does not take handouts!" Brahne shouted. "They gave us that because they thought we were weak! They were mocking us, dearie! Nobody mocks me!"
     "And of course we were upset that they called in for those tickets and took what should have been ours," Dona explained.
     "I see," Gippal said. "Well, congratulations on staying in the competition, you four."
     "Thank you," Garnet said.

     "Welcome to Twilight Town," Namine said.
     "Reno and Rude," Gippal said, "you're the last team to arrive."
     "Don't let that stop you," Reno said. "Make it non-elimination and we'll call it even."
     "I'm sorry to tell you, you have been eliminated from the race," Gippal continued.
     "Nuts."
     "Apparently you were victims of a secret alliance."
     "Figures," Rude said.
     "It's cool though, y'know?" Reno said. "It took a secret alliance to take us out. And I'd just like to add, we were fifty minutes behind a couple teams and check in, what, two minutes after them?"
     "We're the best racers," Rude said, "with the worst damn luck."
     "That about sums it up, Gip," Reno said. "Worst damn luck."
     "Glad you did it though?" Gippal asked. "The race, I mean."
     Reno and Rude paused to think. Finally, Reno responded. "Nope. We didn't win. No money. And a lot of people give sentimental crap about 'great to race with my best friend,' but I already knew this guy was my best friend, y'know? I don't need a stupid race to tell me that. We can run around the world, or worlds, or... whatever. It's not gonna change anything. Not winning just means he and I just wasted precious drinking time."
     "We could be making frequent drinker bucks right now," Rude said.
     "Yeah, seriously! If it weren't for this race, we could be spending money to drink and earn more free drinks!"
     "Sorry to waste your time," Gippal said.
     "Naw, we're just kidding," Reno said. "It was fun."
     "But you owe us a drink," Rude added.
     "Deal," Gippal replied.