Episode 9: Early Show

INT. STUDIO

Baralai sat behind his large wooden desk with the oceanic backdrop. Beside his desk was a large golden couch.

BARALAI (to camera): Welcome back to the Early Final Fantasy Show! If you've been tuning in so far, you'd be our first viewer to stay on this channel through an entire commercial! So let's ignore whatever we were talking about and get to our only popular segment: talking with the castoffs from The Amazing Final Fantasy Race. This week, we're joined by a couple of the best racers this season who finally met their end. Please welcome Fran and Balthier!

Fran and Balthier entered from the left and sat on the couch. Balthier sat closest to Baralai, while Fran sat on the far end.

BALTHIER: Glad to be here, Baralai.

BARALAI: So those delays have been killer this race. Reina and Faris chose correctly to take you two down. I thought you two had the race in the bag.

BALTHIER: I thought the same, but I'd like to correct the statement about delays. They have definitely been troublesome this race, but Fran and I really were not hurt by the Exing, or crossing, if you will. The Ronso had no difficulty whatsoever in getting up those ropes, so we only lost maybe three minutes or so before we could continue to race.

FRAN: Probably less. I barely registered that we had been Crossed before we were allowed to continue.

BARALAI: So what brought you two down, then?

BALTHIER: Navigation all the way.

FRAN: Blaming the navigator, of course.

BALTHIER: No, no. I blame myself as much as you. We are sky pirates and are kind of ashamed that we lost because of an aerial race, but we are used to more height, you see. The drakes were unable to get enough lift to clear those mountain ranges.

FRAN: Most teams failed to navigate properly, but since we were in last place, we were eliminated. If only we all started at the same time we would've been fine.

BARALAI: Yeah, it seems you two have been floundering since a couple episodes ago when you both missed a clue box. Please tell me what happened there! I was so shocked to see it!

FRAN: Too many people were in our way. The view of the box was completely blocked.

BALTHIER: And we were in too much a hurry to remember that our clue told us to find a box outside. So long story short, we saw people rushing inside and the rush made both of us completely forget that we were looking for a clue box. We probably would've seen it rather quickly if not for our heads being in the clouds.

BARALAI: That's unfortunate. It's probably what took you from this race. Aside from that Speed Bump, you two have been doing awesomely!

FRAN: Thank you. May we leave now?

BARALAI: I uhh... Well, I mean...you can, but I hope you'll stick around. I have so many questions.

BALTHIER: Don't mind her. She's just joking.

BARALAI: Really?

BALTHIER: No, not at all. But don't mind her. I'll field all questions as the leading man.

BARALAI: Okay, sure. Paine had a question--

PAINE (O.S.): No, I didn't.

BARALAI: Paine wanted to know about that shards detour. First off, why'd you pick it?

BALTHIER: It seemed more our speed. Neither of us are the strongest, so we were forced into that purely-luck detour. Not our thing, either, but at last moreso than breaking a crystal apart.

BARALAI: Well, you could've at least passed Ma and Zell, right?

BALTHIER: In theory, I suppose. But they had enough of a headstart, and Zell is actually quite capable in the water.

FRAN: Better than both of us. He seems trained for such situations.

BALTHIER: It's why I actually think they might take this. Zell may be easily excited and perhaps not too headstrong, but he's very tough when it gets down to it.

FRAN: And his mother will keep him in check. Without her, they would have lost long ago.

BARALAI: I see. And you two both believe they will win?

BALTHIER: I said might, actually. If I were to pick somebody, I'd actually be rather torn. The sisters are a well-balanced team, Ma and Zell well, I just mentioned them, Barthello and Dona are almost entirely yin and yang, which has amazing potential, and the Ronso are so strong and getting smarter by the second.

BARALAI: Whoa, whoa, okay, slow down. I get the sisters. I get Ma and Zell. Please elaborate on the other two teams.

BALTHIER: I'll let Fran explain. She came up with the Barthello/Dona win scenario.

FRAN: It is only a possibility, but we have always been curious of their abilities. Barthello is a strong man with a kind soul. Dona is a weak woman with a mean soul. But Barthello is not the smartest man, while Dona is, in fact, very inteligent. Should they figure out how to pick up the slack for each other, they could do very well. They did so last leg, so we know it can happen. If Barthello can calm Dona, I believe Dona can lead them to victory.

BARALAI: And you know, I can see that happening. But now, the Ronso? Really? Balthier, you've praised them a lot, but they really don't have the same record as many of the other teams. Most eliminated teams had a higher average position.

BALTHIER: What people didn't notice is how the Ronso work. Ronso are very strong. I don't think anybody will debate that they can lift, push, run...anything physical and they have it in spades. Mentally though, they're dumb. But they're almost like learning zombies.

FRAN: (she sighs) I was hoping you wouldn't say that.

BALTHIER: It had to be said. You see, Baralai, the Ronso learn incredibly fast. They can do just about anything, but they learn by example. If you hand them a book that tells how to, say, toss a basketball into a net, they won't know what to do. But if you show them how to do it, not only will they be able to do it, but they'll probably be better than you in a matter of minutes.

FRAN: We believe they stole our navigational abilities.

BALTHIER: Hah! They at least learned from the best. Somehow they learned to actually think ahead and prepare for the course to come. But honestly, Yenke was absolutely terrible when he had to rapel in Leg...three? Four? But the most recent leg, he nearly beat Fran to the top, and she was about halfway up the wall to start and is amazing when it comes to climbing.

BARALAI: Yeah, Ronso are like that. Most of them, anyway. So who do you think will win the whole thing?

BALTHIER: Difficult question, that one. I'd say Zell has the best potential, or perhaps Faris.

FRAN: I still believe Dona and Barthello will take it. They are getting better.

BALTHIER: They are a wild card and I don't think they will be ready in time.

While Fran and Balthier begin to bicker about which team will win, Baralai mouths "I'm just gonna go" to the camera and sneaks out the back. The camera shifts for a moment, then drops down to a lower angle, still on Fran and Balthier. As they talk, Paine's legs block the camera's view temporarily as she exits as well, leaving the sky pirates to debate. The TV finally goes to an abrupt commercial.