Hey, Squall! How are things?

To start off, you know that new reality show that started a week ago? You know, The Amazing Final Fantasy Race? Well, I have to ask you something. WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME YOU WERE GOING TO BE ON IT?! I was so shocked, I couldn't believe it! Unfortunately, finding this out probably made things even worse for me today. Worse than things already are, that is.

Everything started out okay. For once, I wasn't messing up any orders, I wasn't making any colossal messes, and I wasn't starting any national disasters. I was getting along quite well with the customers and the other employees, too.

Then, out of nowhere, I overheard this guy talking to his girlfriend about the premiere episode of The Amazing Final Fantasy Race. I didn't want to eavesdrop, so I started toward another table to take an order. But then, the guy says something about "that quiet guy who saved the world and his girlfriend who became a sorceress" being on it. And immediately, I knew he was talking about you and Rinoa. I was so very, very surprised, I didn't know what to say. But that's when things went downhill. The guy started saying some pretty cruel things about you both. He called you "submissive" for just doing Rinoa do whatever she wanted and called her "dead weight" for handing off every task to you. Something about her not pulling her weight in anything or something like that.

Now, you and Rinoa are two of my dearest friends and have been since the Adel/Ultimecia thing. So I wasn't just going to let him get away with saying all that crap about you both. I confronted him and defended you to him, demanding he take it back. When he refused, I let him have it right in the mouth. But that got him pissed in a heartbeat. He stood up, and I knew I'd made a big mistake -- he was huge! At least 6'7"!

I got all sweaty and shaky once again, and I ran. He followed me. But then, I tripped over a woman's purse and fell flat on my face. I thought I was done for, but fortunately, the guy couldn't slow down and tripped over me instead. He fell right into a cart a kitchen worker was wheeling by, and he went rolling out of the diner and into the street. Which wouldn't have been so bad, had it not been for the two-ton streetcar that happened to be going by. He lived, but just long enough to give me the finger for that, and that was it.

Just a half-hour after the whole thing happened, the guy's girlfriend had her attorney down there suing the diner for damages covering the whole accident since the guy only ended up out in the street because he was on a cart belonging to the restaurant. The manager agreed to settle out of court and promised to pay for the damages, not to mention the guy's funeral expenses, but now, I'm stuck working here even longer because I've got more money to cover!

This has been a horrible day for me, and I'll bet anything that tomorrow will be so much worse. Good night.

Yours truly,
Laguna

P.S.,

I called Kiros before I wrote this, and he said he and Ward did see you on the show. They taped it for me so I can see it when I get back. I can't wait!