Squall,

I'm not going to insult you at all in this email, 'cause you've already landed the biggest insult on yourself-I mean, leaving your girlfriend, my dream girl, to certain doom at the hands of the cultists? If there wasn't proof that you were totally incompetent before, there sure is now. Jeez. Anyway, I want you to know that Rinoa, Fujin, Raijin, and I will make actual strives to personally see to it that no mischief goes on under our watch at Balamb. We're going to show you up in every way, shape, and/or form, and, if we can get together enough evidence to lobby against you, we might even impeach you from your comfy-ass position. How does that feel you incompe--no, I said I wasn't going to insult you here, so I won't...How does that feel, to know that someone's finally going to hold you accountable for your actions? I hope it feels really damn bad, 'cause it's just going to get worse.

And what's this crap rumor floating around that you're dead? Anyone at Balamb knows you're alive and well, well, as alive as a slug like you (not an insult, just the truth) can be. Rosalee Clip don't know what she's talkin' about. Anyway, look for us later...we'll be egging your windows in between shifts.

Enjoy the single life, sucka!

~Seifer