Squall Leonhart:

     I'm starting to think those RVCs were a bad idea. My vision is starting to get better, but now my hearing is gone! I'm really getting good at this genetics stuff. I'd even say I'm better than Odine, though I'd probably get fisticuffs for it. I've been studying up on DNA and all this biology stuff that I was never all that interested in while I was in school. It's the only reading material here besides some hip-hop magazines that I feel dirty touching. I actually found a cure to my vision and my muteness. 
     See, I invented this new animal. It's a cross between a squid and a duck and a snake. Snuckids is the technical name for it, though I am using a book called Namez for Animulz written by Odine himself. These snuckids are very painful creatures, but they have this strange effect on people like myself who have been deprived of one (or more) of my senses. When they bite you, they can revitalize one of your senses at the cost of another. Because the rabid viper cachickens did a number on my vision, I was down two senses, so I started messing around with them. Now I have no sense of taste nor hearing. It took a while to get that combination, and losing the sensation of feel is very difficult for doing labwork, but I got through it and now I'm here. I don't have anybody to talk to, so I'm thinking about testing more to get my taste back. I miss it. I don't miss my hearing ever since I accidentally made the Shrieking Goat. I only made one and I regret it so much. I don't remember what animals I put in there, but it is a noisy goat. It bleats at 97 decibels. Constantly. Go nowhere near it. Seriously. I'd have killed it by now but it has horns, tusks, and even a spiked tail like a stegosaurus. It's a horny beast.
     Squall, I may need to end this e-mail abruptly. My lion bear (liar) that I ordered to watch for Odine has come back claiming he's in the area. I never know if I can really trust it though. Something about it seems... Well, you get the idea.
     It seems to be true. I see Odine coming this way. He has an army with him too... I wonder if I should test the Shrieking Goat. It may not be combat ready yet...

To arms!
Ward Zabac